A human getting pissed at their vampire boyfriend so they put in a silver sterling tongue stud and bracelets and earrings and their vampire boyfriend is just standing five feet away like “babe. c’mon.”
best so far.
"when women wear makeup they’re basically lying to us" well i don’t see why i’m being blamed for a man stupid enough to really think i have red and gold eyelids
"i’ve never seen a diamond in the flesh"
alright, lorde never been to a kay jewelers or the jewelry counter at a macy’s
Probably not since she’s from New Zealand..
i don’t care what planet she’s from
Do you ever just want to punch an entire fandom in the face?
“Hufflepuffs are boring”
*waves NymphadoraTonks in your general direction*
“Hufflepuffs are stupid pushovers”
*drops Cedric Diggory’s dead body on top of you*
“Hufflepuffs are shy”
*slaps you in the face with Ernie MacMillan*
“Hufflepuffs are polite”
*fires Zacharias Smith at you out of a canon*
my life is pretty much when you throw something on your bed and it bounces until it falls on the floor
meeting peoples moms for the first time is so intimidating because i cant tell if theyre a strict mom or a laid back mom and as i ride in their car i have to slowly figure out what breed of mom they are
"Everything you wanted to know, in this little box.”
There’s a difference.
does anybody else think tired and sleepy mean two totally different things
sleepy is cute and dozing off and happy but tired is 10 cups of coffee and murder
reblogging because the last graphic comment is FLAWLESS
people talking about their sexual experiences and u r in the corner like
20 YEARS OF DREAMWORKS . with 44 songs from the movie’s soundtracks.